Oh, to be in England...

Some people have no manners. I notice today that that nice Mr Barack O'Bama (well-known Irish politician, according to The Corrigans):

"O'Leary, O'Reilly, O'Hare & O'Hara
There's no-one more Irish than Barack O'Bama"

... well, as I was saying, that nice Mr Barack O'Bama commented today on HM The Queen saying that she "stood for decency and... blah, blah.." (some other word) and that she is "one of the things he likes about Britain". This makes her sound like some sort of curiosity; some kind of trinket. It's like saying: One of the things I like about Britain is... roast beef and Yorkshire pudding... or, one of the things I like about Britain is... the weather... or, one of the things I like about Britain is those funny old 'London Bobbies on Bicycles' (two by two)... or, tea-shops... or, Carnaby Street.

This strikes me as rather arrogant in a way. To use such a flippant and throw-away remark about our dearly-beloved constitutional monarch suggests that he doesn't really understand the institution, or Britain. I suspect that the honeymoon period is over for Barack; he's now being judged on his mettle and he's going to have to deliver the goods PDQ, or else the fairy tale will go sour. There's little left of that rosy-glow warmth we all felt when he was elected as the first black president, and the first person whose surname isn't Bush, in years. If he's going to come over here with his entourage of 500 and his helicopters, he'd better learn that we British don't take too kindly to having our dear Queen referred to by Johnny Foreigner as a tourist attraction. No, that's our job, thank you.

Well today, another milestone in the year has passed without being marked – yet again. I'm always disappointed that nobody ever plays an April Fool's joke on me. I'm always ready and willing to be hoodwinked by some jolly caper, but nobody ever seems to take advantage. I was only saying the same to the newsagent this morning (by the way, I was a bit surprised when he told me that the government had introduced a £5 tax on Cadbury's Whisper bars; it made my morning treat a bit expensive – damn that Alistair Darling). Mind you, April Fool's Day must be a dying tradition – the young lad in the petrol station said he'd never even heard of April Foolery. Tch! The young, eh? Actually, I think he might have been a bit on the slow side because he told me that there is a new law just passed that says that as a Volvo driver, I either had to pay a surcharge of £50 or give him a blow-job. I'm sure he must have mis-read that somewhere, but I didn't have time to argue, so I duly obliged. Still made me late for work.

So next year, please, please – someone play an April Fool's joke on me. I love tradition! Just like Mr O'Bama.